Recently I worked with a group of second and third grade students who have an amazing amount of energy and enthusiasm. If left to their own devices there is no telling what kind of mayhem might ensue.
In the past this type of situation would scare me. I used to think that my job was to control the show and get the kids to follow my command.
I have learned a few things over the years as an educator and a parent. One is to admit that what I am doing is not working if it is not working.
I have learned to find the gift in any situation. By this I mean—it is my job to find out what is trying to happen, what is right about what is going on, and work with that energy to create a situation that works for everyone.
I have learned to play the part of director rather than dictator.
I brought in my frequent guest cartoonist, Darrell Fusaro, into class. We work well together because he is willing to go with the flow and be flexible with what he is doing.
He has a great sense of humor and enjoys letting his childlike joy out of the box. I consider this a great compliment for an accomplished artist, like Fusaro, who has been featured in many art books and magazines, and showed his work alongside Andy Warhol.
We spontaneously decided to draw robots with group. The kids loved the idea and we went to work. Mr. Fusaro drew a great example on the board and I encouraged each kid to use objects that they could take from their own life as pieces of their individual robot.
One student drew a robot made up of a TV, a wrench and an iPod; another robot was based on the game Super Mario Bros.
What stuck out to me was the way this group of energetic young children laughed and talked loudly, all the while working and sharing their ideas about what kind of robot to make.
By giving these kids a place to appropriately express their enthusiasm and creativity, and then share their creations with the group, a natural sense of self worth and joy emerged.
Every child is unique, just like every adult is unique. It is important to find those things that naturally motivate them and then give them a place to indulge in their natural yearnings. I find this same thing to be true for me.
There is nothing more painful than trying to be someone I am not. There is nothing more liberating than realizing that I am perfect just the way I am.
By listening for the clues that tell us who our children are, we can create a dialogue based on mutual respect. We do not have to like the same things to get along and share the gifts that spring forth from doing what we love.
As a musician, I gain just as much insight and inspiration from hearing about Darrell’s experiences as a visual artist, or my wife’s experiences as a photographer, as I would talking to another musician.
The same holds true when I talk to, or read about, someone describing their love for gardening, surfing, or a cooking a delicious meal.
The bottom line is that it is not necessarily the activities that we are discussing that create common ground. It is often our inner process of relating to what we love that gives us the greatest sense of oneness.
It is OK to do what we love and encourage others to do the same. Finding a place to express our gifts, talents and curiosities, is more healing than we often acknowledge. At the end of the day, at the very least, we will all have a lot to talk about.
