Be aware of your inner grumblings

“Nothing is happening to you, it is happening around you.” – Mike Dugan

 

It is easy to overlook our own thinking and the impact that it has on our experience-. It is more common to look around and declare that the day, or the moment, is good or bad because of what we see happening around us. This is understandable because of how viscerally we experience things with our five senses and emotions. Unfortunately, when we think and act this way, we are forever victims of our circumstances, and it is easy to lose hope for something better.

The good news is that there is a more effective way of living. When we are having a bad day, rather than try to desperately control the events and the people that seem to be causing our problems, we can address our thinking. When we do, we learn a valuable skill that frees us from feeling victimized by the world, and opens up a new host of possibilities.

Teaching summer school has been a great reminder of how important it is to avoid getting bogged down by negative thinking. Whether it has been students, co-workers, or my own thoughts, it has been an opportunity to simply choose to focus on the positive possibilities rather than the negative happenings of the past. As a result of doing this with relative consistency, I have just completed a five-week session and I still feel great. In the past, I have literally crawled over the finish line.

It was not always easy. There was one day this week in which multiple things went wrong at the same time. My mind felt overwhelmed, and it was difficult to remain positive. On that particular day, the best that I could do was find a neutral place from which to observe what was happening and let life do the work. Step by step, as I remained open to positive possibilities, the day rolled on and the perfect people came forward to encourage and support me.

During times of uncertainty, it is amazing how seductive those subtle inner grumblings can be. It feels enticing to join in on the complaining and suffering of the people around us. All the while, there are equal opportunities to focus on the good that is happening. While it takes practice, and deliberate focus to do so, it is always worth the effort to seek out the silver lining.

The main reason to keep our mind flowing in a positive direction is that life keeps on moving. Regardless of what happened five years ago, or five minutes ago, the trajectory of life is forever pointing forward. If we choose to dwell on, and fret about the past, then we are missing the obvious. If we are no longer looking ahead, then who is driving the vehicle?

In our district, we encourage students to take credit for their own thoughts. We shift the focus from what is happening, to what they are adding to any situation. While it is easy to look around and cast judgment on what others are doing, it takes some practice to reflect on what we are doing. By choosing to look at what is going well, and what positive possibilities are available, we begin to recognize more good. We are also more prone to come up with creative solutions and ideas. These new thoughts revitalize us and stoke the flames of our enthusiasm.

If you are feeling stuck in a rut, take a moment to review your thoughts. Have you gotten mired in the heavy thoughts of fear, doubt, and worry?  If so, relax, and breathe. Gently decide that you would now like to shift your focus onto the positive possibilities. Remind yourself how much better it feels to think hopeful thoughts.

Do not worry if you experience inner resistance in the beginning. It will not take long for a new stream of thoughts to enter your mind. Before you know it, and often without you even consciously recognizing it, you will be off on a new adventure. The people around you will start singing a different song. You will notice that you feel relief, and the world seems brighter. What more could you ask for?

 

Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, to find out more go to www.DarrellandEd.com.